I got a Bombay duck, I got a velly Delhi belly
Got to copulate, I got to roll in de jelly
heard a man sing de blues, wid a big fat belly
they told me his name, and it was George Melly

Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo
Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo

I met her in a brothel in a Bangladesh
She got de Vishnu stockings, and a muslin mesh
I was so drunk I just couldn’t care lesh
as I gave her six of de velly, velly best

I gave her one on de marble floor.
She said, ‘you want de couch, you got to pay me more’
I said, ‘Back off, you’re a calculating whore’
She said I was a fellah didn’t know de score

Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo
Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo

I prayed to Ganesh, told him what I’d gone and done
He said, ‘upon my tusk, you’re a velly silly one’
Him-alaya day say, but I know him not
He said, ‘go back home an put de tea in de pot’

I got a Bengal tiger in de bungalow
It de finest rug I ever shot, you know
I got an elephant tusk, I got a monkey paw
I got de game reserve wardens all knocking at de door

Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo
Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo

I got to place a bet up in old Tibet
I got to wash in de Ganges, get my willy all wet
I love my pussy velly well and yet
day tell me I got to take it to de vet

Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo
Oh chapatti, oh chapatti, ricky ticky, dicky die doo